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Coaches
Corner - Article
01/06/03
"Give it Positive"
Coaching Like A Newlywed
When you were first married, did you notice all of your
partner's warts? How about the bad driving, bad breath, or
habitual snoring? Not likely, as early in a relationship we
tend to focus on what attracted us to our partner, but as we
begin to take these attributes and other qualities for
granted, we begin to see the flaws.
The same is true in coaching and I am here to tell you that
we need to resist the temptation to take the positives for
granted and see only the warts. In a recent issue of The
Sporting News, Laker assistant coach Kurt Rambis discussed
his effort to focus on a player's pluses, "We try to keep an
8-to-2 ratio, that is eight positive comments to two
negative ones. Players always appreciate hearing about the
positive things they do. I've found that the negative
comments sting a little more then, and players are more
likely to take them to heart."
As you can see, Rambis is not advocating that coaches ignore
mistakes or be "Pollyanna", but rather he believes in a
balance that is titled to the positive side of the scale. If
this is true when you are coaching young men in the NBA, it
is even of greater importance in working with boys and girls
of high school or youth league age.
I know that as a college coach, keeping this balance was one
of my biggest weaknesses. Sometimes good coaching includes
ignoring mistakes since most players already know what they
have done wrong. For those players, often younger boys and
girls, who don't recognize their errors, coaches can often
convey the message by pointing out when it is done correctly
without dwelling on the negative.
As you work to maintain this 8-to-2 ratio, here are a couple
of tips. First of all, avoid the buts. Too often I found
myself following a compliment with the word but, and then
mentioning something that was done incorrectly. Secondly, it
is a must that all praise be specific. General praise
carries little weight. Conversely, when you attach a
specific action to the compliment, the player knows that you
were truly watching and that it isn't false or phony praise.
As a result, the compliment is more meaningful. The same is
true for all of the people you are close to, including that
significant other with warts.
"A survey of one hundred self-made millionaires showed only
one common denominator. These highly successful men and
women could only see the good in people."
-Jacques Weisel
Dave Bollwinkel
Dave Bollwinkel works with
businesses, teams, and youth sports programs around the
country on leadership/teamwork. For more information on what
Dave can bring to your group, go to
www.CoachOnAndOffTheCourt.com.
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